Six Years. Six years ago today we drove into Philly and closed on our house. Our 100+ year old house. Our kids were 18 months and almost 3 1/2 years old.
I've been reading old posts over the last couple days from this blog and an older one I had. I've been thinking about why I don't write in this space any more even though I miss it.
I realized that part of it is because my kids are older. At 7 and 9 they are not 'cute' and 'little' anymore. My fourth grader has body odor. My 2nd grader has just realized that he and his sister are not actually equal - that she is older and gets to stay up later and do more things. And he doesn't like that one bit.
I read some posts to them last night and showed them some pictures. Ollie asked if I would keep writing about what he does so that when he's older he can look at it and remember.
I was reminded that every day is still a project. A process. This project of parenting. This house. Discovering who we are and who we want to be. Striving to live more simply and create some semblance of calm and peace in our home.
I haven't been making anything lately, either. Unless you count my first attempt at coconut macaroons last night. And I really miss it. eieio is going by the wayside - with just a few pieces left to post in the shop and give as gifts. I am not doing any craft shows this season. I love sewing but I don't always love making the same things over and over again. I miss sewing for my family. I look at those old pictures and the kids are wearing things I've made. I remember for a while whenever Ollie would get something new - no matter where it came from - he would ask me "Who made this?". As I have stepped away from creating, they think less of it in their every day lives. I don't like that.
So The Dad and I have a list of projects for the next couple months. Lots of work on the house - fun stuff like carpeting and painting. But also things like finally sewing Ollie's curtains (for which I've had the fabric for a year and a half).
And we're changing the way we are parenting. Growing with our kids. Teaching them to be more independent so that, some day, when they go off into the world without us they will have a little bit of an idea of what they are doing.
I'm going to try again to share some of that here. I'm not making any promises but I'm hopeful... We'll see.